Dr. Mort Orman here and in my fourth post in this 5-part series, I’m going to review Part 3 of the new book by Mindvalley founder Vishen Lakhiani, The Code Of The Extraordinary Mind.
Part 3 is called “Recoding Yourself: Transforming Your Inner World.”
A Prescription For Happiness
The best way to summarize this entire 3rd section is to say it is essentially one big, well-constructed, two-pronged prescription for life-long happiness.
Like the old physician recommendation “take two of these pills and call me in the morning,” Vishen Lakhiani is saying “do these two things and you’ll be happy for the rest of your life.”
What are these two big things?
They are:
- Recode your inner self so you are not postponing your happiness until some future date, and so you are not looking for things outside of you to bring you true happiness; and
- Recode the way you think about your goals and your definition of success, so that you can always take personal control of your satisfaction and not give it away to others or outside forces to determine.
Be Happy Now
Vishen points out that many people try to be happy in all the wrong ways.
They have either been conditioned to tie their happiness to things or circumstances outside themselves, or to only feel happy when they achieve some desired end result or goal.
While it can indeed by very satisfying to have nice things or achieve worthwhile goals, there is no need to postpone being happy until that time arrives.
One of the secrets to living a happy and fulfilling life is to purse your dreams and goals while having fun in the process and while being grateful for whatever you have each day, rather than feel unhappy or disappointed by what you don’t yet have.
He even points out that the happier you are while you are working or pursuing other lofty goals, the more effective and productive you will likely be.
One quote he mentions in the book to summarize this advice is “We shouldn’t do things so we can be happy, we should be happy so we can do things.”
He also spends a good amount of time talking about three daily practices that can help you “recode yourself” and become more happy each and every day:
- Gratitude
- Forgiveness
- Giving
I’ll leave it to you to read how he thinks about and utilizes these three practices every day.
Think Big…But Set Self-Fueled Goals
The second part of Vishen’s two-pronged happiness formula is to make sure your goals are both big enough and well-constructed, so that you have the maximum self-control about whether they can be accomplished or not.
He calls these well-constructed goals “self-fueled” goals, since if you chose them correctly, you can always find creative ways to be realizing them each and every day, and nothing external to you can ever keep you from achieving them.
For example, if you make your goals about achieving some well-defined end result, you might not feel happy until you get that final prize and you may never even achieve it, if circumstances don’t go your way.
On the other hand, if you make your goals about having certain inner experiences or feelings that come from actively pursuing your dreams and visions, and from making partial progress along the way, you are not dependent on achieving some ultimate one-time prize and you can keep pursuing your goal until you let go of it or die.
For example an end-goal might be to have a million dollars in your bank account. But a better self-fueled goal might be to be paid fairly for the amount of value you provide to others and to keep trying to increase that amount value and serve more people as time goes by.
Both goals can lead you to a very large bank account, but the latter one gives you much more freedom and flexibility to feel happy, satisfied and accomplished each and every day.
My Reflections On This Prescription For Happiness
Watch this short video to find out how I applied these very same principles in my own life, years ago.
Also, if you missed any of the three previous posts in this series, here are the links to those discussions and videos as well:
How To Be Extraordinary Part 1
How To Be Extraordinary Part 2
How To Be Extraordinary Part 3
To your health, happiness and success,
Dr. Mort Orman, M.D., International Speaker, Author And Founder Of The Stress Mastery Academy | http://DocOrman.com
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